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The week's news in memes

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Happy Friday to you all,

We’re feeling particularly blessed that we haven’t descended into full scale nuclear war (yet), and will be promptly celebrating by demolishing 6 or 7 pints somewhere in central London later.

Onto the important stuff - let’s get you your weekly roundup of the business and politics news you need to know from the UK and beyond.

⏰ Today's reading time is 5 minutes

Quote of the Week

❝

“I’m very impressed with his wife.”

Donald Trump (talking about Keir Starmer)

Trump says UK is protected from tariffs ‘because I like them’ as trade deal is signed off

Keir Starmer and Donald Trump continued their unexpected but strangely wholesome bromance at the G7 this week, unveiling a new UK–US trade deal covering the aerospace and automotive industries.

Here’s the TLDR:

  • Aerospace: UK exports will face 0% tariffs going forward.

  • Auto sector: Tariffs cut from 25% to 10%.

  • Steel: Still faces 25% tariffs, though this is lower than the US’s global rate of 50%.

British Steel is a sticking point, as they are currently owned by Chinese firm Jingye and Washington wants guarantees that UK steel exports aren’t a backdoor for C h i n a to dodge American tariffs.

The UK government, which took over British Steel in April to prevent Jingye from doing a Maggie Thatcher and shutting down the Scunthorpe plant, says it’s working on this.

His animosity for the European bloc didn’t stop the 79 year old for mistaking the UK with the EU when announcing the deal, seconds after he dropped the official documents on the floor.

But never fear, Keir is here! The British PM secured his scout badges for assisting the elderly by bending over and picking them up for him.

“So how’s the missus Keir?”

OpenAI boss: Meta offering $100m plus to poach my staff

OpenAI CEO Sam Altman says Meta is dangling eye-watering sums—up to $100 million in signing bonuses—to lure his top talent, but claims “at least so far” none of his “best people” have jumped ship.

Meta, which owns Facebook, Instagram, and WhatsApp, is going all-in on AI, recently dropping $14 billion to acquire nearly half of Scale AI.

But while Meta is clearly happy to spend big, Altman insists culture still counts, saying his team is staying put because of OpenAI’s “really special mission”to make a shit-tonne of money build superintelligence i.e. AI that can outperform humans across the board.

I’d like to see AI outperfom us at day-drinking and making shitty memes. That’ll be a sight. Still, the salary arms race for AI-nerd talent is heating up faster than a crackhead’s spoon.

Analysts say top AI researchers are now like Premier League strikers—elite, in short supply and wildly expensive.

Or in Arsenal’s case, always injured.

“The AI gold rush continues at a breakneck pace,” said Indranil Bandyopadhyay of Forrester, calling talent “the most fiercely contested resource.”

Altman, speaking on his brother Jack’s podcast, also took the time to throw a casual jab at fellow autist Zuckerberg’s Meta:

“There’s many things I respect about Meta... but I don’t think they’re great at innovation.”

Sam “Non- Profit” Altman

Considering Zuck thought turning the workplace into the Wii Sports loading screen was a good idea, Altman may have a point.

MPs vote to decriminalise abortion for women in England and Wales

 

In the biggest change to reproductive rights in England and Wales in nearly 60 years, MPs have voted to decriminalise abortion.

The amendment—known as New Clause One—passed with a majority of 379 to 137 and removes the possibility of prosecuting women for ending their own pregnancies at any stage.

Labour MP Tonia Antoniazzi, who proposed the amendment to the Crime and Policing Bill, said the goal was to end the criminalisation of vulnerable women.

She highlighted the recent case of Nicola Packer, prosecuted for an alleged illegal abortion and found not guilty in May, as well as that of a woman jailed after being coerced into taking abortion pills by an abusive partner.

What’s changing—and what’s not:

  • The 24-week legal limit under the 1967 Abortion Act remains unchanged.

  • Abortions still require the approval of two doctors.

  • Healthcare professionals operating outside the law will still face criminal prosecution.

  • This amendment simply removes women from the reach of criminal law in abortion cases.

The bill still needs to pass further stages in Parliament before the changes take effect.

Social media overtakes TV as main source of news

For the first time ever, more Americans get their news from social media (54%) than from television (50%).

The Reuters Institute's massive global study of nearly 100,000 people shows that YouTubers, TikTokers, and podcasters are rapidly replacing traditional journalists as gatekeepers of the news.

Leading the pack is the human thumb Joe Rogan, whose podcast reached 22% of Americans in the week after Trump’s second inauguration—especially young men, a group legacy media has long struggled to reach.

Traditional newsrooms are losing both influence and eyeballs—and increasingly, revenue—as audiences shift to short-form video and platform-native content.

Other key findings:

  • X (the artist formerly known as Twitter) has become more right-wing since Elon Musk’s takeover (who would have thought!). Right-leaning users grew from 10% to 15%; left-leaning users dropped from 17% to 14%.

  • Facebook and YouTube dominate news delivery globally, reaching 36% and 30% of people respectively. You can thank your racist uncle for this one.

  • 46% of Brits say they now avoid the news regularly—up from 29% in 2017—citing burnout and bleak headlines (another reason to refer us to your friends).

  • AI chatbots like ChatGPT and Gemini are emerging as go-to sources for younger audiences, when they’re not using them to cosplay having a girlfriend. 12% of under-35s using them for news, sparking concerns over accuracy and transparency.

It’s crazy to think that 200 or so years ago the two village idiots having a conversation would have just been ignored.

Now it’s a news source that ends up reaching millions of people globally and looks like this:

British Steel secures ÂŁ500m contract to supply UK train tracks

British Steel has landed a ÂŁ500 million, five-year contract to supply track for Network Rail, potentially saving thousands of jobs and stabilising the future of its Scunthorpe steelworks.

The deal will see British Steel forge over 337,000 tonnes of railway track, covering 80% of Network Rail’s needs until at least 2029.

It’s quite the comeback story, as the news comes just two months after ministers used emergency powers to prevent Chinese owner Jingye from shutting down the blast furnaces, which are vital for producing virgin steel—steel that’s never had sex before made from raw iron.

Its four blast furnaces—named Bess, Mary, Anne, and Victoria—are down to two operational units.

If they’re switched off, restarting them would be financially and technically prohibitive, effectively ending the UK’s capacity to produce its own steel from scratch. The government, while not fully nationalising British Steel, is actively seeking private investment and may still consider full public ownership.

The timing also tees up the government’s long-awaited national infrastructure strategy, expected later this week.

Scunthorpe is the UK’s last remaining producer of virgin steel. On the topic of virgins, it was also voted the Least Romantic Town in the UK.

Netanyahu doesn't rule out targeting Iran's supreme leader and regime change

Israeli Prime Minister and noted war criminal Benjamin Netanyahu has hinted that removing Iran’s Supreme Leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei and overthrowing the regime could be a path to ending the current conflict.

In an interview with ABC, Netanyahu said, “It’s not going to escalate the conflict, it’s going to end the conflict,” when asked about targeting Khamenei.

Over the weekend, he also suggested that regime change in Iran was now on the table.

Given this is the same guy who said the following, we’d take his geopolitical predictions with a pinch of salt:

I guarantee you that if you [the US] take out Saddam, that it will have enormous positive reverberations on the region.

Benjamin “Kissinger” Netanyahu

Israel’s strikes have reportedly killed senior military officials, including Iran’s wartime chief of staff Ali Shadmani (though unconfirmed by Tehran) and targeted nuclear scientists—part of what Netanyahu claims is a strategy to dismantle Iran’s nuclear capabilities.

Iran has retaliated with two waves of missile attacks on Israel, resulting in at least 24 Israeli and 224 Iranian deaths, according to state media.

Inside Iran, the strikes have created a rare moment of national unity—though not necessarily around Khamenei. Analysts say public sentiment is focused on defending the country but resentment towards the regime for failing to protect civilians remains high.

And while Netanyahu says he and Trump are aligned, the apparent divergence in tactics—and Trump's public denials—suggest the West's strategy toward Iran may be fractured.

đŸ»Half Pints

Quick-fire news you might have missed

Memes of the Week

Tragedy of the Week

Whilst Israel and Iran bomb the shit out of each other, leading to civilians losing homes and loved ones, please ensure you spare a thought for the real victim in all of this:

Benjamin Netanyahu.

He revealed yesterday that his son had to postpone his wedding for the second time due to the ongoing conflict.

The irony of making this sombre announcement outside of a recently bombed hospital in southern Israel was lost on him.

Besides, children starving to death pales in comparison to reprinting RSVP cards.

Our hearts go out to him and his family at this troubling time.

That’s all for today.

We’ll be back, bigger and better, next week.

Our mission is to carefully curate and craft the best memes to help you get up to speed with what’s happening in the world and have a few laughs whilst doing so.

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